myownface | Voicemail / Disclaimer

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Voicemail / Disclaimer

"I get my own phone? I get my own PHONE. You have GOT to realize that's going to mean you'll get my voicemail all the time, right? I mean, they can't hand me my own PHONE and then expect me to not use it, so leave a message on my voicemail for me and I'll get back to you, unless I don't. And if that's the case I guess you're going to have to try again later, aren't you? Hah!"

BEEP!

For the Demon Marcus Business Voicemail, go here!

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Sparkle took a moment to consider that.

Fair enough. And I wouldn't want people thinking that they could grow a new me by planting the top of my head in a bucket of dirt or something.

Why would people want to grow a new you?

Karina was honestly curious about that.

I mean, it'd be a waste of the the one we've got.

I dunno, raising a Sparkle Army would be kind of cool. If I didn't need the top of my head. I guess?

He was overthinking this now.

The worst part was, now she was seriously thinking about it.

... It would put a whole new spin on that non-profit thing a future me had. Sparkle Plenty suddenly seems a lot more ominous a name...

You'd pretty much need a charity just to keep all the Sparkles fed.

Otherwise they'd all take off and steal things. Which he could get behind!

Oh, please. I could afford all of you. I'm going to rule the world.

Confidence was not a trait she lacked, no.

The thing is, I don't know what I'd do with all of you. One is enough of a pain for me.

Put me to work! World rulers need make-up, wardrobe, speech-writers... maybe don't put me to work as a speech-writer.

That could lead only to pain.

Yeah. That long wait time for her next text was definitely because Karina was staring at her phone in horror.

Him? As a speech-writer? She'd be doomed.

I'll write my own speeches! she finally responded. Because no. But it's true that I could probably find uses for all of you, if I gave it enough thought...

Which was kinda creepy.

I'm hurt that it would take you so much time to find things I can be useful at. How many of me are you going to make, exactly?

If it was any less than fifty, Sparkle was going to follow up with a frowny-face emote, picked helpfully from his phone's typing menu.

Whatever, Sparkle. Whatever.

I haven't decided yet. It's not like I already rule the world. That's still a work in progress.

Well, get back to me when you actually need a Sparkle Army to Sparkle Plenty for you, and we'll see what can be arranged.

He was not going to ever donate the top of his head to the cause, mind.

So in about twenty years then?

She had a lot to do before conquering the world, okay?

Sure. I should be on my way to being a mature, functional adult by then, at least.

Apparently he had a lot to do on the way there, too.

I'm going to be really irritated if I have to get my Sparkle Army from jail, just so you know.

What? She would be! She'd still get him out of there, but ugh.

Besides, look where you are now! Things are getting better for you.

Right now, I am watching some girl named Mary-Anne demonstrate a fantastic performance piece about how she is, literally, a butterfly. Introductions aren't boring, I'll give them that.

There was another delay before he sent another text.

I'm not in any hurry to go back to jail anyway. I'm almost too old for juvie now.

...is she literally a butterfly?

The things Fandom made her ask. It made Karina sad.

I'd tell you that's the spirit about avoiding jail but I'm not sure that's the right reason to not want to go.

While she would insist she is, I'm pretty sure she's really just a theatre geek with a hand-me-down Lisa Frank t-shirt. I didn't know they made them in adult sizes.

Shut up, he was jealous.

Hey, any reason that kicks me out is a worthwhile one, right?

I didn't know that either! So how jealous are you? Don't steal her shirt.

And maybe Karina was going to save this text to remind her to see if she could find Sparkle his own shirt at some point. It was, like, a step up from socks.

That really depends on the reason, though I suppose I'll support anything that's not criminal or harmful to yourself.

Super jealous. SUPER jealous. There was never really a little boy variant, either.

Sparkle's childhood had been pretty deprived, really, but this took the cake.

See? Then it all works out. I'm only criminal occasionally.

I'd rather you weren't criminal at all.

If a text could be plaintive, this one was.

And I'd rather the world was a happy place full of sunshine and free puppies, but...

See? Lisa Frank!

I can't promise anyone I'll stay out of trouble. I can only really guarantee that I don't want to BE in it.

I never asked for a promise!

Seriously, Sparkle. Did she look stupid?

I just said I'd rather you weren't. That's different. Breaking the law is a big deal to me, so I can't help wishing even if wishes are kinda crap all around.

Hey, around there, who knows what wishes will come true? The island is just messed-up enough to start granting those things indiscriminately just because.

It was a few more minutes before he added,

Does it help if you just never find out about it?

It took Karina a long, long time to answer that text. Long enough that it was late afternoon by the time she did and she answered it while walking along the beach, holding her sandals in one hand while the water brushed her knees.

Finding an answer to his question wasn't easy. Between her own feelings, their friendship, and her careers, Karina wrestled with herself about it.

Eventually, she texted:

Do you remember the conversation we had about strings a long time ago? Legally, it's probably better for both of us if I don't know anything about the laws you break.

That was truth.

But I don't like the idea of being a friend you HAVE to lie to either.

The very idea hurt her feelings in complicated ways. Honesty was, strangely enough, one of the things that let them be friends--at least, it was in her eyes. Even if it was sometimes a weird, sideways honesty.

So I don't know, Sparkle. I don't know.

Then I'll use discretion or something. And I'll fucking hate it, but I'll understand if I admit to something that's too damn much and you feel like you have to do something about it.

That was probably the most frank honesty that Sparkle had shared with anyone in a while. And here it really was that one big important thing between them. No-holds-barred honesty.

I'll probably be pissed, though.

Voicemail / Disclaimer

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